pants that no longer fit...for now;)

I'm sure that everyone has a mental list of things that make them depressed. Maybe we don't all itemize them, but somewhere in our mind we know the things that can instantly make you down. One of mine is definitely the sad and shocked - sometimes not so surprised - feeling you get when you try on a pair of pants that used to fit a few months ago.

Pic by Abby Lanes

Today, since it is so freaking hot and humid I decided to try on a pair of jean capris that fit well seven months ago. Looking back, November, when I say it to myself, doesn't sound too long ago, but when I count out the months it seems like a long time. Note my rationalization for as to why it may be acceptable for those pants to no longer fit and how I tell myself, "oh yeah, that was ages ago! No wonder they don't fit! It might as well have been seven years ago!", whatever. Anyway, back to my train of thought. So I tried them on, and although I managed to squeeze them on, I had to suck it in just a little to button them up. Unfortunately they had the dreaded tight feeling around the thighs. Grrr damn thighs! While I attempted to tell myself that they were freshly washed and jeans are always kind of stiff after they've been washed, I eventually accepted the fact that all of my previous months of hard work at the gym were wasted when I stopped eating and living healthy. I guess all those McD's, pizzas and other late night fast food runs had caught up with me. I knew they had, but the clothes that I had been wearing in the mean time have my much loved stretch material in them. Gotta love how stretch material lets you live an illusion for as long as the stretch can take you.

So what am I going to do?

Well continue going to the gym - something I've only recently started to do again. Eat healthy, but attempt not to deprive myself while also trying not to binge (so hard).

What is my goal?

Lose inches off hips and thighs (keep some booty). I guess I should measure myself at some point (next post I swear). But since, I also track some of my progress by hopping on the scale, if I am being truthful with myself I would like to lose around 20 lbs. Almost everyone has a magic number in their head. Mine is between 133 - 135lbs.

My starting weight: 155 lbs.

My current weight is 153lbs.

Body type: Pear shape.

Pic by S Baker

It would be nice to be able to buy a dress that fits my top and bottom, instead of gaping open where my breasts are supposed to be.

So although those pants - and sadly many others - in my closet don't fit right now, I will get back in them. I am determined.

Pic by pixelposition

Also need to work on social life. Weight loss alone won't make me happy. It is so easy to blame an irregular work schedule for a lack of a real social life. I've gotta work on that aspect. How? I'm not really sure yet...suggestions?